Cosmic origins

IMG_0461.JPGThe sun and moon are a perplexing duo.

Here she was, an emblem of light and beauty—the source of all life casting herself away so the pesky moon could have his moment from time to time. Or so everyone told her.

And the moon was a headache inducing disappearing act; only showing glimpses of himself before finally uncovering his full potential once every so often. Yes, he provided a cool glow in the dark of the night, and of course there were so many clichés about the beauty of the moonlight. But that wasn’t his real source of power.  He pulled people in just as he would the tides, intoxicating everyone in his wake.

This dark nature should have turned the sun away, as it had so many people before her, but instead it encouraged her. She wanted him to shine, to sparkle just like she did each morning.

My dear, the moon isn’t taking anything from our precious sun, she is simply carrying him with her light, with her love.

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ask yourself

ask-yourself

“I think it’s funny” she spat out through clenched teeth and tears, “that at one point he was fighting for me, fighting to love me and now? Now he acts like it wouldn’t matter if I lived or died. And how do you answer for your sins when you’re being told you don’t deserve forgiveness? How do you find the will to exist?”

How do you find the will to exist?

 

EXODUS: 2

exodus-2

I called your name at least 10 times, poking your arm with each annoying nickname I could think of–but you simply brushed me off and continued to read. The sound of rustling papers mixed with the sour smell of dusty shelves that engulfed the library; you were my only source of entertainment it seemed.

I wanted to go, I tried to give you some lame excuse but my words trailed off as your eyes reluctantly left the page to meet my own. I winced slightly at the tone of your voice when you said my name, it sounded far away–pleading almost. My gaze softened slightly and I let out a deep breath, I would stay. Immediately your expression brightened–my personal sunshine. I reached for my sketchbook, a sigh of relief leaving my lips the minute my fingertips traced the worn leather; I had nothing better to do, so why not draw my muse–you?

I moved with caution, careful not to draw your attention to me–you hated when i drew you; but how could I not? Your entire being seemed to have been hand-crafted from the purest things on earth. I glanced from you to my paper, my pencil moving lightly to capture your image on the canvas; I became so heavily engrossed in my little project that I didn’t even notice you staring at me. When I looked up momentarily I jumped at the sight, you frowned and shook your head with amusement dancing in your eyes.

You laughed and asked if I had been drawing you, I felt my face heat up and I scrambled to close the book. Explanations and protests began to spew out of me like word vomit, the upheaval stopped when you gently tugged the book from my grasp; I tried to stop you from looking but you simply ignored me. I watched as you lazily flipped through the pages, smiling slightly at my doodles; you paused momentarily on one page–I cringed. You had found my sketches of you, all the charcoal outlines messily displayed before your eyes. I wanted to say something but coherent sentences weren’t coming out, you handed the book back to me without a word.

I waited for a response–maybe even feedback–but you said nothing. You went back to your reading, the silence radiating around us. The bell rang, ending our free period. I hastily grabbed my bag and stood, wanting to escape confrontation. You stepped into my path and I looked up at you, waiting. You leaned in and lightly kissed my forehead, lingering there for a moment. As you pulled away you mumbled “Those drawings were beautiful”. You left before I could even comprehend the words.

 

And every time I look at you my hands become restless 

Searching for something to grasp on 

I put you on paper so that I can keep you 

So that I can finally touch you 

The same way you touched me

 

Hello my babes another EXODUS post!! I haven’t posted because honestly I didn’t know what to type, writer’s block ya feel? Anyway I’ll try to update the story more later–I’m thinking that I’ll just continue it here and do a few normal posts for every two chapters I post. Sound good? I hope that you’re doing OK, remember to stay hydrated and tell yourself that you love you. (I’m serious). Bye Bye for now!!

one girl 

p.s What do you call a pig that does karate?  A PORKCHOP (: 

 

 

EXODUS

exodus

I wanted to stay here forever; your chest was firmly pressed behind me while I doodled lazily in my notebook. I could feel the light vibration of your heart against my back, the delicate way your fingers tangled and untangled my hair; we were content, we were happy. But it had to come to an end.

You were the one that pulled away first; I felt your nimble hands stop working at their intricate braiding and your body shift slightly as you let out a deep sigh.

You told me our time was up before nudging me playfully. I groaned in response and nuzzled myself closer into you. I had pleaded with you to stay with me for these few moments–the only moments I had with you these days. I was selfish, but you didn’t mind; being the amazing person that you are, you graciously complied with my wishes.

You told me that we couldn’t avoid it forever; I simply said “we could try”. You kissed the top of my head with another deep sigh of adoration. The gesture was sweet, but I knew you well enough to know that it meant your word was final.  I pulled away from you so I could see your face, your stature towering over mine in an almost comedic manner.

I asked you if it would be different, and you didn’t answer. You did what you always did, which was stare. But not into my eyes–no, you had the kind of stare that looked at every part of a person’s soul. The type that would make a person squirm uncomfortably and shift their eyes shyly. Only, I had grown accustomed to this mesmerizing gaze and I merely stared back into those hazel mirrors with my eyebrows raised.

You broke the peace once more, standing up and looking down at me expectantly. I tried to search around your eyes for some sort of feeling, but I was drowning in irises. So instead I  held out my hands –trusting you. You grabbed them and led me out of my room, out into the real world.

You painted constellations on my skin 

While the space between us held hushed secrets 

Words spoken for only the moon and stars to hear 

We were in our own galaxy 

Two infinite beings racing towards oblivion

 

 

Hey guys! So that was a little excerpt of a novel I am currently working on; the structure is a bit unconventional, it’s basically snapshots of these two people’s lives together. Each chapter ends with a small poem like the one above, it’s been a challenge to write but well worth it I believe. 🙂 

So in the list of topics from a couple of weeks ago I mentioned posting snippets of my stories like this, but I will still cover the other topics. 

Thanks for reading

– one girl

p.s I missed writing on here so much you don’t even understand 🙂